Wow. What has happened to all those years? 2026. A number so far in the future when I married Ric in 1971. Who would have imagined all that would happen in this span of time?Lovely, exciting, uncertain, adventurous, brave, timid, sad, happy, angry, worried, grateful, frightened, lonely, apprehensive, blessed, contented, loved. So many feelings and emotions in a span of 54 years shared with another. Just reminiscing today about the wonderful life I have been given and thinking of all the friends and experiences along the way.

I just simply want to say thank you to those who have been part of my journey. You are seen and appreciated. I am looking forward to the adventures that lie ahead.

Just a weird little post this morning. When we think of being a woman, we never think of dealing with certain things normally seen among the male persuasion. I am here to testify to the appearance of facial hair once women reach a certain age. It hardly seems fair that we must go through cramps once a month followed by the demon menopause and, when we finally pass these milestones, we have to deal with hair on our chin. I am just saying, it is not a great experience when I have to tell my bearded husband that I must go and trim my beard. I must confess it is only three hairs, but ugh!

For those of you at this “hair on the chin” stage, you will understand. For those of you who are too young, be prepared for this horrifying experience. Have a great day!!

When I first began this little blog a few years ago I was taken aback by being referred to as “spry”. I am now at a place of being grateful for the term and am considering it quite complimentary. The saying “life happens” is becoming all too familiar.

Navigating health issues is a familiar theme with those of us “of a certain age”. The race to see how many ‘ologists I can see is now a game I am playing. I am building quite a portfolio. Although I have great admiration for those men and women who pursue degrees in medicine and become the ‘ologists, I would much rather meet them in different circumstances than the poking and prodding that is necessary to “get to the root” of the problem. Honestly, if I was a car, I would be traded in for a new model.

Having said all that, I am amazed at the knowledge that has been accumulated over the last number of years. Where at one time there were no good solutions to some illnesses, now we have choices. I now listen to all they tell me and read everything I can find about each issue as it happens. Unlike the days when a doctor would diagnose something and the patient would always say okay and follow blindly, we now know to question and educate ourselves. I am grateful to live in an age when it is not just okay to question, it is encouraged.

For those of you who have reached the age of faulty parts, be encouraged. There are amazing doctors and treatments for you to explore. For those of you who are not yet spry, understand that we may not move or think as quickly as some of you, but we are still going and as the subjects of the practicing doctors, we hope to make your health journeys easier.

” The older I get, the greater power I seem to have to help the world: I am like snowball-the further I am rolled the more I gain.” Susan B. Anthony

Recently, I began thinking about how to assess a life. I think all of us have thoughts about who we are and if we make a difference in the world. How is the world made better because we are in it? I do not believe the answer lies in comparing our lives to others. Thank God, we are all different and have our own realms of influence. I do not believe that whoever gives the most money or those in the public eye are the ones who make the biggest difference in every day life. I believe the difference is made in the every day kindness and humor of us ordinary human beings. How many times has your spirit been lifted by a kind word, hearing the laughter of another, receiving a smile from a stranger or a hug from a friend?

Sure, I would love to have lots of money and be able to give large amounts to others in need, but that is not my life. I am grateful for the opportunities given to me and the people I have met along the way who have made me a better person by knowing them. These are people who have encouraged me, believed in me, told me jokes that made me laugh out loud, hugged me, cried with me, shared their lives with me.

In today’s world, we often hear about prosperity, about making lots of money, about how to influence people. I want to change the conversation and make it about the people who show everyday kindness to people and animals without thinking about personal gain, those who care when someone around them suffers loss, those who create beautiful art just for the satisfaction of the creation, those who plant and nurture beautiful gardens to make our world more pleasant, those who do their jobs with courtesy and appreciation for their coworkers and customers.

I am happy for the financial and career success of the people who work to that end and make it happen for themselves. I am more impressed by the ordinary people who go through life every day, making a difference to those around them by their generosity of spirit. This is how I wish my life to be assessed, not by a long list of accomplishments but of loving remembrances of a life shared with others and, perhaps, a smile when they hear my name.

Because we own a candy store, we have lots of young people come in to shop. In the last few weeks, I have heard several people as they are looking around at different areas of the shop use the term “killing time”. I was reminded of my mom correcting me when I was younger and wishing the weekend would hurry and get here or that the school year would be up and Summer vacation would arrive. She always cautioned me not to wish my life away. It made me think what an odd phrase that is, “killing time”. Surely there is a better way to express the thought of waiting to be somewhere else.

As I get older, I am aware of how priceless each moment is and of the value in being in that moment instead of rushing off to the next and the value in taking time for each person. There are people who have passed on that I wish I could sit with again and take time to listen without the nagging feeling that I need to move on to the next task. We never get back those opportunities. Perhaps looking at life through older eyes makes me understand the importance of each connection and wonder at how many times I have missed learning from those encounters.

I think we need to rethink that phrase, “killing time” and change it to “time to enjoy.” The lyrics to an old song by Paul Simon, Feelin’ Groovy/The 59th Street Bridge Song:

“Slow down, you move too fast. You got to make the morning last.”

I am making this my new mantra. Life is too short to rush through without paying attention to everything and everyone around us. When I was young, I felt time had no end. As I get older, I understand my mother’s admonition. Maybe I need to remember more of the things she told me! Slow down. Enjoy.

As you know, we own a candy store and have customers every day, both new and regulars. One of my regular customers is a lovely woman who comes in several times a year and is always laughing and joyful. She came in today with family members who have come to visit. It was a large group, all full of fun and enjoying tastes of things remembered and trying some new flavors of taffy and gummies. I have always been a bit in awe of this woman and her attitude about life. She has a husband who always comes in with her and he is wheelchair bound with a debilitating ailment. He can no longer speak and has difficulty even turning his head to look at something but his eyes light up being in the store and seeing all the colors and tasting a few things. His wife includes him in every conversation and makes certain he sees everything. She is laughing and happy and is obviously full of love for him. There is never a look of pity or frustration from her, only love and tenderness.

This is such a lesson for me and one from which I can learn. Commitments in life should be made not just for the fun times when everything runs smoothly. Watching her in an extremely difficult situation, dealing with a person she obviously loves who can no longer care for himself and taking her commitment to care for and love him through it all with grace is remarkable to observe. In that moment, she became my hero. Someone who I aspire to be if and when hard times come.

On the way home from a doctor’s appointment today I was thinking about the joy in living and the importance of living each day to the fullest. So many things are out of our control. I sometimes get bogged down with those things and lose sight of the life I enjoy, the people I love and the experiences I am privileged to have. So, this is my “be grateful” blog.

Although, as I get more spry, I certainly have my share of aches and pains and occasional memory lapses. I have a business that I love in a beautiful old building where I also live, I am surrounded by things I love that carry sweet memories, I have people who love me and who I love in return. I have my memories of the people I have loved who have passed from this life and gave me so much of themselves. I have had wonderful dogs who have given me joy and laughter and a wonderful little old lady dog right now who could not be sweeter or cuter. I have my health. I can go for walks and still climb 26 stairs several times a day. I enjoy good and peaceful sleep most of the time. Having been married to the same man for 50+ years, I still enjoy his company and laughing and eye rolling at his corny jokes. My list keeps going.

There are certainly those things that try to rob me of a joyous life but these are mostly things over which I have no control. The situation in the world right now is sad beyond expression, but I cannot fix it. Politics try to take my smile, but I have only one vote to choose the direction my country will take. And what am I going to do about gas prices and inflation? I am powerless to fix either one. I have friends and family who have illnesses but I cannot mend them and make them well. I am not immune to moments of anger and frustration but I am attempting to focus on the blessing that is my life.

So, today I am laughing at my frailties and just simply enjoying being alive. I’m am taking deep breaths and holding my face to the sun. I am enjoying the laughter of children coming into the shop and watching the love shared between other human beings. My joy in the day does not really fix anything except my own view of my little area of the world. Sometimes, that is the best we can do.

So, I have always had knee jerk reactions to being called honey, sweetie and other terms of endearment by people that do not know me. Having said that, as a now whitish haired person of a certain age, I am less offended by a young person–someone under twenty five calling me sweetie. For those who do not know, I own a candy store and have many young people coming in. I love them all and Ric and I want all ages to have a wonderful experience being in the shop. It is truly a happy place and we have fun laughing and sharing candy and the memories that go along with the retro candy. Today, I had a lovely young woman call me sweetie and instead of wanting to explain to her that I am not her sweetie, I suddenly felt that it was quite a compliment. Go figure. Perhaps, as a candy store owner, I should just introduce myself as Sweetie. The name fits with a candy store, don’t you think? We can change Ric’s name to Sug(the “sh” as in sugar) and we can be Sweetie and Sug.

Just as people adopt a stage name, we can have shop names. I guess that means that when I am out in the world in other shops and places, I can still want to slap someone for calling me sweetie or honey but once I walk into my shop, it will be my name of choice. Sounds nice. Or maybe it could be a moniker for a tag team in wrestling. Career change–is there an over sixty wrestling venue? I have heard it said that you are never too old to learn something new. If it involves laughing, I am in. Seems like laughing is one of the few things we are allowed to do anymore without buying a permit. Laugh on, my friends, while we are not yet taxed for that pleasure.

Where has the time gone? It seems that only yesterday, I was introduced to my little sister, got my first library card, went through grade school, junior high and high school, went away to college, went to work at a great job, bought my first car, got married, traveled to exciting places, learned the craft of restoration, lost my dad and others who I could never imagine living without, made a huge move to a historic building and did a lot of work on that building, opened a gallery, was a caregiver for my mother, and now own a candy store and restoration shop. As I reflect back on all the changes, it seems as though I am looking at another person’s life. Who I am today certainly embodies all those times and learning experiences. While looking through some photos the other day, I realized how many physical changes have also occurred along this journey.

Thinking about living through seven decades and having been married for five of those decades is remarkable to me and surprising, not because I didn’t plan to live this long or share my life with the same person forever, I just never thought about it. I think that when you are very young, getting older is incomprehensible. You have a feeling of immortality almost. Then, life sneaks up and, suddenly, your hair is turning white, your skin is changing–all that sunbathing of your youth is making itself evident and your bones get stiff overnight and creaky in the morning. Sometimes you have what my dad would call “a little hitch in your get-a-long.”

But, I have never been ungrateful for life and for the amazing experiences I have had and all the people who made me a better person along the way. Even the sad or hard experiences have made their mark and helped me grow. And, after that first long paragraph of things, there is so much more. The people–my people–who I have known and loved have made life even more wonderful.

Sometimes, life is so busy that I do not take time just to be grateful. We all have a certain time to be on the earth and we need to learn to appreciate it and love every day we have. A lot is packed in to the years we are each allotted. It is my aim to make the most of mine. Not certain what the next ten, twenty, thirty years may hold but I want to embrace every single one. In upcoming years, I may need some assistance in getting around, but if so, I hope to be laughing and enjoying the ride. It may dwindle from a roller coaster to a carousel, but it will still be a fun ride with lots of surprises. And, if I forget someone’s name or need an assistance device to get around, I am planning to have fun with that as well. Nothing more freeing than laughing at yourself!

So–red lipstick and big earrings forever and, an artist painted cane!