Heard an interesting thing said today, “Weeds are flowers whose virtues have never been discovered.” Made me ask the question of myself, which one am I–the undiscovered weed or the popular flower? I love wildflowers and, until they became a trendy garden thing, most people plucked them out by the root and discarded them. I find it interesting that often the honey bees seem more attracted to the wildflowers. Of course, I always pull out the weeds by the root unless they bloom and if they do, I make them part of my garden. Makes me wonder how many times I have pulled a weed whose time had not yet come to bloom.

Substituting person for weed and life for garden, I have to ask myself how many times have I not let something bloom before I ousted it from my garden. I also wonder how many times I have been viewed in that same way. I think, in today’s world, many people get pulled as weeds because they do not share popular views or because they choose to take a different path. I have worked to become the person who views the world through my own eyes and not because someone else orders my thoughts or chooses to find my path. It is time for all of us to begin to listen to each other and to be allowed to express our own thoughts and not be greeted with animosity. To once again find the joy in being different individuals. We may still be considered weeds in someone else’s garden but they have the right to cultivate their own garden as they wish. Some may be roses, some are zinnias, some are sunflowers. I choose to have a few unruly blooming weeds in mine.

I hate it when I get an urgent need to do something and I get to the other room to complete my mission and cannot remember what I came to do! I hate it when I pick something up–like my phone, glasses, scissors etc.–and lay it down somewhere and cannot find it. I hate it when I stand up and have to sit back down because my legs did not engage with my instruction! I both love and hate the fact that I have been married for 50 years. I love it because I have shared 50 years of my life with this amazing person and I hate it because it makes me feel so old. Some days, this growing spry stuff can be annoying. I do not wish to to go back in time, just slow it down a bit.

While watering my garden today, I found myself both delighted at my plants and angry with them at the same time. These thoughts kind of parallel life for me. Each plant begins with their own pot with good soil and room to grow. Sometimes, they will share themselves with another plant via the birds and insects and, that is usually okay with me if they mix well together and respect each other’s space. I grow angry with invading weeds that must constantly be eliminated or they will take over the whole pot and kill the plant that was meant to live there. I know this is completely illogical-but, I am not a Vulcan–so logic is not always present, and I find myself berating my plants for not crowding out the weeds who I deem as terrorists.

Here is the parallel with life. We have our own body and mind, separate from other individuals who also have their own space. Why is it that we are constantly allowing others to invade our space and disturb our joy? I don’t want to share my little piece of earth with those who choose to act as weeds and disrupt my peace. I enjoy visits with others and talking and spending time with them but I do not wish them to take over my space. I wish to remain my own person and not be part of the “Borg collective”. I welcome others who wish to be individuals to share my space as long as we remain separate entities. I was reflecting on these things this morning on my roof with my lovely plants. They are beautiful, but if the weeds are allowed to stay, the plants will be destroyed and lose all their beauty.

I think we must be careful in life not to be destroyed by those people or thoughts that will do us harm. To remain an individual in a world of conformity is not always an easy path. It is a much easier route to let the weeds in and lose our identity in the process. Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote ” To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment”.

Just my thoughts for today while watering and weeding my garden and expressing myself with strong words to the terrorists. Obviously, I have watched Star Trek way too many times but I do think Mr. Spock would find my disdain for the Collective to be logical.

I went to the doctor on Monday and had a good laugh with him about the aging process. It seems that every day, there is a new thing going on with my body. It is never-ending. I wake up almost every day with a new pain or a new spot on my skin. It has to be accepted with humor–I mean what else can I do? Crying over something that is out of my control is unacceptable. Life is too short. When I was young, it seemed life would go on forever, but as the years creep up I am realizing that I am not immortal or invincible. Whaaat???

So, now when I find something new or feel a new pain, I just accept it for what it is–growing pains. Or, perhaps better phrasing would be “growing older pains”. I have always believed that I can do almost anything–if someone else can do it, I thought, so can I. I am now having to accept the fact that I probably cannot do some of those things anymore. But, on a happy note, I am doing the things I want to do. Seems that, for me, growing older brings a common sense attitude to life. Now, the question is “Do I really want to do this?” I may never bungee jump or parachute out of a plane, but I am okay with that. I have had the good fortune to do some fun things during my life so far and I am not ready to stop pursuing new goals.

Here is my advice for today, not that anyone asked for it–learn to appreciate the things you have and the every day accomplishments. Don’t be fearful of new experiences and meeting new people. Laugh more, play more. Love life! I feel lucky to have the life I have and to wake up every morning with a grateful heart–even if it takes a few minutes of stretching for my body to concur. We have this one amazing life and we must learn to live it to the fullest. A favorite quote from that little bear who is wiser than most: “Life is a journey to be experienced, not a problem to be solved.”-Winnie the Pooh

What a year!! The last twelve months have presented many challenges for the Woodard-Gorden House. I think it is time to draw a line in the sand with one side saying “injuries and floods” and the other side saying “no more”. There is a Little Rascals movie from a few decades ago that has Alfalfa running away from bullies. He stops and looks up at the sky and exclaims “And the sky opened up and God looked down and said ‘I hate you, Alfalfa’.” Kind of how I am feeling at the moment. Seriously, I do not believe that God hates me but perhaps is just giving me learning experiences. I must not be making the grade, because the lessons seem to be unending.

As many of you know from previous blog posts, I have been through several joint surgeries this past year due to my growing “spryness”. Finally, the doctor who performed my shoulder surgery gave me the okie-dokie to continue normal activity and I was ready to tackle my work. Aside from our candy store, I also do restoration work and, during this time my work has been piling up in my studio. So, I went to bed on Sunday night, April 4, looking forward to starting on my china painting and airbrushing on Monday morning. At some point in the night, the hot water hose on the front bathroom vanity became detached and, at five o’clock on Monday morning, it was discovered. Our two front rooms upstairs were flooded and the front shop was experiencing a hot rain storm–we have tankless water heaters with unending hot water. We jumped up and immediately got the water turned off to that vanity, grabbed shop vacs and began the cleanup. Two and a half weeks later, we have finally gotten damaged stuff–including many pounds of candy–tossed and have begun to see what must be repaired. Now, the insurance settlement has been worked out, the bids for repairing the damage are coming in, replacement candy has been ordered, a new vanity has been purchased and life is resuming to a more normal pace. I am ready for a year of not so much drama!I am finding it interesting that becoming spry has made me calmer during a crisis. Perhaps it is because I am finally realizing that life happens and I really have no control over most of it. I have never been afraid of hard work and cleaning up after a flood is a new experience that I can now check off my list.

We have had lots of laughs during this year of crazy. There comes a point in this journey where the only way to deal with crazy is through humor. I am learning that there are many perks to getting older. I do not take myself too seriously, I do not worry so much about the opinions of others, I choose not to be stressed about things that once would have required a pill to settle me down. I find that being a bit cranky is acceptable behavior. I am grateful that the craziness in our lives is fixable with a bit of work and doctor’s visits. I think we are two fortunate people who found each other and who can laugh and learn together. Life is life–it is what it is and growing spry is part of the trip.

Today is just a simple observation. I miss smiles. So many people are masked and I miss the smiles. Being a shop owner, I see lots of people on a daily basis and, I am finding that the smiles of my customers are what I miss the most. I dislike masks with a passion for multiple reasons but the biggest one is being able to look at people and see their whole expression. Oh, sure, some people have eyes that smile and that is good—but the smile that goes with the eyes is beautiful. I will be thrilled when the masks are gone and human communication is back to normal, face-to-face, smile-to-smile. I am ready for a mask burning bonfire!

Lately, I have been more aware of the inevitability of aging and the issues that go along with it. Funny how the things that used to puzzle me as a young person are now happening to me. Examples: putting my earrings on!! I do get them on eventually but why has it suddenly become so hard to find that hole in my ear? Lining my lips before I put on my bright red lipstick and having one side lopsided, trying to match it and having huge red lips by the end of my morning routine. Then, trying to even it out with my finger and having red streaks that have to be remedied with make up. If nothing else, I am expanding my vocabulary and not in a good way!! Another one is my balancing act when putting my legs into my pants/jeans! Always able in the past to stand on one foot and pull one leg on, reverse sides and pull the other leg on and all with out the help of a chair or the wall. Anyone?

I am health conscious–I walk at least 2 miles a day at a fast pace not including doing 26 stairs multiple times. I watch my diet and try to be balanced–with the exception of chocolate. I look at myself and feel mostly good about how I look. Oh, sure, I have more lines on my face, more chin than I want and not quite as firm on my upper arms as I would like to be but–for an older gal, I do not feel that I need to hide in my closet. It is the “unseen by others” things that bother me. The things that I am personally painfully aware of that are causing me grief. Other examples-enamel on my teeth! Always needing to look in a mirror after I eat to be sure I do not have lovely vestiges of my meal lingering on. Always needing reading glasses to read the menu and sometimes a magnifying glass to read the fine print on a bottle. Having to say “What?” to my husband or replying incorrectly to the question. There are so many other things that come to mind–things that I prefer to keep to myself–but I am certain that all who read this will understand. Especially if you are “of a certain age.” I am learning that many of us choose to try to hide the aging process with nips and tucks and other surgeries, but the truth is, some things are going to happen that cannot be corrected by any other method than just learning to deal with it. With humor. Usually. Sometimes.

Even though it makes more wrinkles, laughing is the best way to deal with aging. I will continue to exercise and do my best to remain healthy, both mentally and physically. I will not sacrifice having joy in my life by worrying or being grumpy about my frailties. After losing friends who left this life way too early, I am grateful to live, laugh and love. I am determined to age with grace and humor. I feel certain that more mildly humorous things will crop up as we go along this journey. Although our journeys are individually different, sharing our laughs and stories make it more fun.

The old saying by Thomas S. Monson is true, “Find joy in the journey.” Do that.

I have been reminded lately of time and the importance of what I do with it. A friend uses the expression “I have time for this person” (fill in the name). I love that. Another friend taught us to “listen to the stories.” Both of these things–listening to the stories and having time for someone–are becoming increasingly important to me. Perhaps in the process of becoming spry, I am learning these lessons.

When I read a great book, I am always amazed at the lives of the characters and how interesting they are. I am realizing that each of us has a story and, even though to us our story may seem boring, if the right author was telling that story we would find it fascinating. I was with a group of women friends last night and, as I looked around the room, I was thinking about the stories of these women that I am blessed to know. Each of them have amazing stories of loss, love, success, failure, survival. How fortunate I am to have them in my life. I wish to always have time for them and to know their stories. I believe that this sharing of each others lives brings me to a better understanding of myself and to an appreciation for others.

For my story, I think perhaps I need a writer of humor. Seems that I am always cracking myself up! From the mornings when I awake with the alarm to the evenings when I drag my body to bed, I am always in some state of hilarity. Not sure if I have always been this way or getting older just makes me see more humor. Laughing at myself certainly makes life more fun.

I am trying to learn the importance of laughing with people over the funny things they do or listening and sharing their sadness when things go horribly wrong in their lives. I think we can all become better people by just paying attention to that person standing before us–really seeing them. It enriches my life to hear their stories and expands my knowledge of being human. I am making it my goal to be more aware of those around me and to learn the stories of those who have had different life experiences than me. There is an old saying “Variety is the spice of life”. I think maybe the “spice” that each of us brings to life is the individuality of our experience and how we live our life because of it.

I encourage you to listen to and to really see the people you come in contact with. You will become a better person for your effort. The next great story could be right in front of you!

Sometimes, the world becomes so serious that I feel I want to run away. This is not a new thought for me–I have made up many bogus names while thinking of running away to some new place where I would be anonymous. I have gone through the makeover in my head, changing the hair color, makeup, style of clothing, etc. I will never do this, you understand, but occasionally I have this urge. I attribute these ideas to too much reading! I read all the time in many genres of books. I actually love my life and my people but am often curious what life would be like if I assumed a new persona.

The question remains. Would I be the same woman who sometimes messes up and has regret or could I morph into my new identity and just live life concerned only with my own well-being? I know a few people who seem to live their life that way–as though the world revolves around them and nothing touches them. Every time I go on one of these imaginary journeys, I come to the conclusion that I could never really do this. I am connected with those around me who are my friends and loved ones. I would miss them all. Besides that, I could never get away from my red lipstick!

I love hearing friend’s stories, celebrating special occasions, laughing and crying together over the unexpected. I love that I have friends who bring out my protective side, friends who challenge my ideas, friends who are concerned when times are hard and friends who enjoy the silly moments. I am beginning to appreciate the silly moments more on my journey to spry, those moments of hilarity when laughing begins and makes me forget everything else for a while. I appreciate laughter while sharing a meal and the residual good feelings from being with friends. Although there are those who do not tolerate “being silly”, I am a proponent of silliness moments. Those moments are what get me through the hard times the world presents and what make me smile while laying in bed with sleep eluding me.

With the New Year coming in 3 weeks, I am making a determination to encourage the silliness factor. I want to laugh more and worry less. I want to live this one life I am given to the fullest every day. I want to wear the fun hats and impractical shoes. I want to try new things and not worry if others may think me silly. I want to be less critical of myself and more forgiving to those around me. This last year has impressed on me the importance of enjoying every moment I have been given. So, I say eat the cake, be silly, wear wax lips, put some silly in your life. It may not make life easier but it will certainly be more fun!!

During the last months of insanity, we have rediscovered the old westerns, not just movies but also TV series. Our world seems so focused on all the bad right now and I refuse to listen to it anymore!! I have chosen not to watch the circus that is called national news and, although the local news is sometimes crazy, it is mostly state and community news and, of course the weather– important to all Oklahomans. We all want to know if trees are going to fall on our houses or if torrential rain is coming or an early ice storm–these are the things for which we must prepare. The fear and panic in the national news has driven normally sane people into their homes, terrified to even go for walks outside or for visits to their neighbors and families. Even more disturbing are the contradictions in opinions on what precautions to take.

So, we have chosen to go on with life as normally as possible. We go for long walks, open our store, visit with friends, go to the grocery store or out to dinner, read, watch old westerns and retro TV shows. For me, surgeries on my joints have been the theme of my year so I have made new acquaintances of doctors, physicians assistants and physical therapists. Lovely people but I could have happily lived the rest of my life without knowing them in a professional way. In these crazy times, we have been drawn to things that distract us from the real world. I remember sitting as a child watching the old western television shows with my dad. It is amazing to me that I remember most of the theme songs and can sing them as they play. I find it comforting to escape into a world where you can watch the story unfold and know that the good guy is going to triumph. Some of the acting is not always the best and the story lines are a bit hokey but, in the end, the good guys are triumphant and the bad guys are punished. I like being reminded that good does triumph over evil even though in real life it is not always at the time we want it to happen. It is probably good that I am not in charge. I think you would not want me to be Sheriff.